I never really thought I had a reason to blog, I'm not famous and I'm not suffering from nothing life threatening. I don't really have a story.

I guess initially it was a way for me to get my feelings out. I write when I need to make sense of something or because I just need to express it and if that is then posted then you all get to read the inner workings of my conscious mind.

I think now though, it's evolved from that. It still is a way or me to talk through everything with the imaginary being on the other side, and for that it's pretty therapeutic but it's also becoming more about connection.There's so much noise in life. TV and film, magazines and who's been photo shopped and why? There's so much distraction from what, in essence, I believe everyone is truly craving.

Genuine human connection.

I'm going to bare my soul a little here. I'm surround by people I love, my family and friends are everything but sometimes I'm still lonely. I'm single and I have been for, ohhh... Three years, going on, thing is I'm honestly perfectly happy on my own with no one else to worry about (anyone who knows me well can attest). I just think as I'm hurtling towards 25 at a speed of life that I'd not think I can keep up with, half of my school friends are either engaged, married or have kids and I'm sitting back here, behind my desk wondering what the actual hell just happened. Did I blink and miss the part where my life is supposed to happen? Did I take the wrong turn and miss meeting the person who will change my life or is that just me?

They say if you don't like something to change it. Only you have control over your life.

Excuse my Explicit language. I think this is bollocks.

Sure, on some level as you're growing up there are 10X more things that you can control about your life that you couldn't when you were a kid, like your bedtime and when you eat but sometimes, but even at 22 there are 100 more things about my life that I can't control and I think,  I need to remember that I can't control everything and for now that's okay, a few more years and just maybe I'll be where I think I should be. Maybe I'll be right here, but that's okay too.

I guess the reason I started this blog was to get my thoughts out but I think if i can make just one person read one of these things and go 'uhh, you know what, I'm a bit like that and that makes me feel better' then I'm on a good track.

I'd love to know what you guys are think about this, any of what's above here and you're more than welcome to throw some comments down below.

Cheers.

Dear me,
     
               Deep breaths. I'm from the future. I'm you 8 years from now and I've got some advice and life lessons to get you through the social maze that your life will be for the next 6 years.

1. Smile more. I know you smile a lot with your friends but just smile for no reason, laugh at funny crap on the internet laugh at mum's bad jokes because they're always going to be bad in the very best way.

2. Don't compromise on who you are for anyone. You might not really know who you are yet and that okay but don't stop doing things because you think people might think it's weird. Be true to who you are because it's important.

3. Learn to ignore snide comments and backhanded compliments. If you can ignore the ignorance of some people you'll be much happier in life.

4. Move on from your obsession of that boy that you'll probably always love. He's doesn't like you back but it's not his fault so don't blame him.

5. Learn that you are good enough and one day some amazing guy is going to see everything you are worth.

6. Love yourself first. If you don't like who you are, the way you look change it. It is possible to change it, I promise. It's hard but you can do it.

7. It's just high school. It's going to be really tough and there will be really bad moments but it's not going be the end of the world. Things really change when you get to college.

8. Keep in touch with more people. Really honest to go try to text more. Hold on to your friends. They're good people.

9. Do as much as possible. You'll get to a point in your life where you'll have no time for anything so keep finding new things to do in your life that are just fun for the sake of being fun.

10. You know your best friend. That crazy Brunette you've known for the last two years. You're still friends. Best friends, and you learn that you really wouldn't be who you are without her. Hug her more, promise to never leave her and tell her that your future self told you you'll be friends forever, because it's true.

I love you Anastasia Kavvadia <3

If you could tell your past self, at any age one sage piece of advice what would you tell yourself?

Cheers.

I get this question a lot.

Every time I'm introduced to someone new which is pretty frequently these days what I 'do' is not really an easy question to answer given that my 'job' isn't really considered a conventional job and I am technically paid by the government.

 I am a full time career for a family member.

I usually I defer to my graphic design degree and the freelance work I've been doing with Hoop & Threads (a interior design company based in Camberley) for the last two years.
This seems like a good answer and it's left there.

The truth is I met Erin - she owns the company - through gumtree I think, when I was fresh out of college with a design degree and no idea what to do with it. Initially what we had agreed to was student portfolio building work but quite quickly I found that it wasn't sustainable and we came to the conclusion that I must be paid some for my work.

Over the last two years we've worked on this from wedding decorations, she's also helped me source other freelance work like logos and other company branding. We've done several launches of new collections and designs and a total company re branding which has an official Facebook relaunch this weekend.



The one thing that is very overdue is an actual meeting.

That's right... I've known Erin for the last two years and we've yet to meet in person, the beauty of social media has meant that we've actually become very good friends and we'd know what each other looks like but I think its kind of sad I think and really should be organised.


Head on over to Hoop & Thread Official Etsy Store for the wonderful range of home decor items available. - Hoop and Threads


Truthfully, I'm not actually sure how I got into design. I choosing GCSE's at school with no clue what to do and and even then it was just when in doubt do something you'll enjoy so I did art and textile along with RE and Business - wasn't my choice. Going on to college so I continued art and the found graphic design I guess. Sometimes it happens like that.

Either way I'm very grateful to have found Erin and her company and to have given me the chance to find my style, I guess. Finding the sort of designs that I enjoy spending time on and making design fun again.

If you're interested in any more of my design work, I feared some of my work with Hoop and Threads and work from my college days over on My Portfolio.

I'd love to hear how you got where you are, in life, in work, in love. write me a story down below or send me a link to your blog or site and I'll head over and give it the time it deserves.

I think a good percentage of the population can cop to having at least one bad habit at some point in their lives. I'll certainly admit to still having some bad habits and - I guess - making some bad choices about what I do with my body. I have been a full time smoker and was for three years between the ages of 18 and 21, I've recently dialled back to only smoking socially which I've considered a good thing, I still smoke but less that I was and that's the lesser of two evils i suppose. I've also had a bout of biting my nails. Past these two I wasn't really sure what other bad habit I might have shown or what else is considered a 'bad habit.'

A quick Internet search sent me to Pavlok.com and their list of  more that 150 things considered bad habits. So a few more of these apply to me like spending a lot of time aimlessly scrolling social media or cracking my knuckles and interrupting people ( I'm bad with this and I'm very aware it's awful conversational etiquette).

Though upon closer inspection of this list I have to say that I think it's a little strict. Things like watching TV right after work and snacking or masturbation and eating after 8pm. Sometimes eating late cannot be avoided, and wanting to wind down after a stressful day at work by watching trash TV is really pretty normal. I'm  pretty sure unless you have a will of steel snacking is something almost everyone does. Masturbation is also something pretty much everyone does whether they say otherwise, if it's very regular that it could be construed as a habit but why is it bad when it's not negatively affecting you or people around you.

The oxford English dictionary defines a habit as:

A settled or regular tendency or practise, especially one that is hard to give up.

So, things like using your phone a lot in social situations could be hard behaviour to change and there for considered a habit, bad or otherwise. But things like eating meat or humming to yourself  (if it's not annoying anybody) shouldn't, in my opinion be labelled as bad habit if it's just a choice individuals make about how they live their lives.

I think theses kinds of list that are labelling these things as bad are causing anxiety or worry, intentional or not, to people with these 'habits' or lifestyle choices and I don't think that's really very good. 

If you get a chance head over a scroll through THIS list yourself and comment down below what you think should and should not be called a 'bad habit' and if you've got any habit that you're aware of  and know you should change but can't or don't really want to. 

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Good Question, I'm 22 years old and I don't think I've figured this out yet. But that's okay.

If for some reason we were at a gathering; a fancy grown up dinner party of a mutual friend, spontaneous coffee shop interaction or something of the like and didn't know each other at all you ask me to tell you about myself?

Firstly, I'd panic. My social insecurities lie somewhere under the strong external shell I've had since high school and without thought I'd probably say something like "There's not much to tell."

Id really be selling myself short there. There's actually a lot about me.

Fun Fact: I once had a fully functional electric organ in my back garden that I used to play classic Lincoln Park riffs on because that's all I knew.

I'd have to take a minute and think about where to start but for those inevitably awkward silences but we'd probably have a beverage of some sort to sip until I produced words.

Do I think of something that might amuse or intrigue? My angry little blob of low self esteem that sits on my shoulder would say 'amuse' because humour is my defence mechanism. That would probably fail because I think I'm funnier than I am in actuality and can only produce a genuinely funny one-liner 1 out of 14 possible jokes.

So intrigue? The blob would say there's nothing intriguing or even remotely interesting about me and I'd flick it off my shoulder and squish it with my shoe.

My name is Cristina Harrison Gore.



Cristina is spelt the Spanish way because I was born there even though I'm very English. Harrison Gore is not hyphenated because they don't do that in Majorca and I don't remember anything from living there because mum relocated when I was just six months old.

I have an older sister whom I've been ridiculously close with since, well probably since I've been able to understand the forming of unconditional loving attachments. Don't misunderstand me here, we've argued but it was over pointless things and tween drama like always wearing my clothes without asking or using my shampoo.

My dad wasn't in the picture much and if he was I don't really remember him vividly. I know my memories from that age aren't all that reliable and I'm sure I heard somewhere that the more often you try to recall a memory the farther from the actual events they become. Nevertheless my mum met someone new when I was about two and began a relationship that has made the family whole. My step dad had two boys of his own and we became the blended family we are today.

I've never known any different so in my mind I've always had two brothers and a sister. The thing is we didn't always live together. For a pretty long time the boys had their flat in the middle of town at which we stayed on a semi regular basis and we had our flat before the three bedroom house that did eventually share.

I spent my childhood and most of my teenager years in a small town. A friend form college once compared it to the town from the Vicar of Dibley but I really didn't know everyone and it wasn't that small. It did mean though that when my best friend booked her eighteenth birthday party in the town/event hall and my year one teacher was serving drinks she got to see my ID and remembered me.

Rather surreal experience actually.

It's stuff like that, that in hindsight, I loved about living there. It was small, a kind of slow moving town but at the end of the day when I was kid I never worried about riding my bike on the road or walking home from the bus stop in the dark because nothing ever happened. I think that's why even now I'm not at all anxious or nervous to walk around dark streets at night.

I went to a church of England primary school. Two actually but I've never really had faith in god or a god of any kind but have great respect for those who do. I went to high school in the same town I lived in and only really began to commute when I started college in Poole.

I was overly outspoken in school and often pretended not to care what people though even though I obviously did. I was known to be loud because it was my defence but I cared. It wasn't really until after high school I sort of found myself. I became more relaxed in who I was and even though I was still loud that was okay because I had good friends. I found my style in college too and even though it's kind of grown up with me over the last six years the basis of my style started age sixteen as did my daily frustrations caused by winged eyeliner. I still can't always get them even and still get really excited when I do.

I started BTEC Level 3 Art and Design in 2012 and then onto HND Graphic Design in 2014.I met some very interesting people along the way. The fine arts teacher who was amazingly eccentric and a good laugh, some memorable crushes on both fellow students and one or two of the TA's about which I received endless grief from friends; and those friends, some of which I'm still in touch with and some drifted away got married and appeared on a English cooking TV show on channel four with her brother in law.

The latter half introduced even more people mixed with some that I'd been with the previous two years and I met 'Captain Pretentious'. He introduced me to whiskey and obscure films that I'd never have watched if not for him and consequently love. A friendship with benefits happened and we're still really good friends to this day; some people can't understand how we're still friends after we've slept together and that amuses me.

Since college I've been freelancing for Erin L Interiors whose a start up from Basingstoke and I've also been a full time career for my Mum.

This has it's own ups and downs and if I find the courage I might talk about some of them.

I'll finish up this introductory 'about me' post with a question.

If someone asked you for three words that described you, what words would you give?

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